Saturday, February 2, 2008

Fancy Pants Man - Is he alive?

As you may or may not know, Fancy Pants World 2 has recently been released.
Here's a link:
I'm not going to talk to you about the game itself, as it's awesome without
saying but there is one thing that bothers me.
Fancy Pants Man - What is he?
In World 1 we surmised he was his own creature on an alien planet but
in World 2 another human appears.... who speaks English...
So if Fancy Pants Man really is on Planet Earth, he must be a superhero as he:
  • Defies gravity (Level 5)
  • Runs at enormous speeds
  • Has incredible stamina and indurance
  • Has muscles at all only a skeletal structure ... with hair

Then there is the matter of his pants...

  • They can withstand the tremendous friction without any signs of wear or tear
  • They are as flexible as he is
  • They instantly change colors with the signal
  • They can be exchanged for a second chance at life ingame (They must be pretty valuable to Death...)

So I surmise the following backstory:

Mr. Fancias Pantolonias was once an aspiring pants salesman just like everyone else. Then everything changed...

In an unfortunate accident involving a spontaneous combustion at a factory, Mr. Pantolonias was scarred forever... literally... His muscles, skin, and even his brain and organs all burned away leaving a mute unseeing skeleton. Mysteriously only his hair survived and his precious pants were scattered across the world. Ashamed at his condition he would wear oversized pants to try to cover up his skeleton but it was no use and passing children would often ridicule him, calling him "Fancy Pants! Fancy Pants!".

A passing deity took pity on him and told him these words:

"Thou art burned, and scarred but thou art not defeated. With thy magical pants I have given thou, thou shalt defend thy people from animal tyranny forever"

With those words the deity embowed his pants with magical properties, ( the same ones discussed earlier) and sent him on a quest to find his long lost pants and defend the nation from the attack of charging penguins, lonely rabbits, and other animals of that ilk.

He now wanders the world searching for his pants, abandoned and alone, the pantshifting skeleton moves on...

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